So here it is, the last update from Afghanistan, and this wandering in the wilderness is coming to an end. It’s been a long month of passing the torch, preparing for christmas, and making sure all the boxes are checked for coming home. That said I apologize (sort of) for the lack of updates, but in the grand scheme of things this blog has been relegated to a back seat for the more pressing matters at hand. That and without Internet access it’s hard to post anything, such is the way of transition.
So here I sit in Camp Dwyer, our last stop in Afghanistan before we begin the flight home. Incidentally I’m actually typing this blog on my iPad (shameless plug) and will updated wirelessly. Yes I’m halfway back to civilization now with unrestricted Internet, and more food than I care to eat*
*tangent: So I was in the chow hall yesterday and was feeling very guilty about eating lunch, not just lunch there but lunch in general. My normal has been two meals a day and small snacks. Point in fact I had to stop running about 2 months ago due to shin splints so no exercise, and I’m still loosing weight, and no I’m not dieting per-say – I’m eating less because there is less to eat. So here I sit in the chow how with a plethora of food to choose from and I get a cheeseburger and some fries. The guilt is overwhelming, fat kid food – and as I see another marine walk by with not one but TWO cheeseburgers, it dawns on me that I’m feeling guilty over normal portion sizes, it’s not that I’m over eating it’s that for the past six months I’ve been under-eating. So to stick it to the man, I got ice-cream.
/end guilt trip
So here I sit in the same place I typed my first blog in country about losing my earthly joys and I’m discovering that the thought of them approaching me through space and time as my path takes me back to them has grown in measure due the experiences and moments in this place. This time apart has been good. The food is a good example. I used to over eat simply because I could, but go without or rather go with less for so long and you find you appreciate the simple things more. See we tend to over indulge on everything that bring us happiness (and food really makes me happy) thinking that the more we have the better we will feel, but in reality, saturation leads to mal-content, in everything save one.
It is in His presence that my joy(s) are made complete. Because I’m designed to be saturated by Him, nothing else can ever fill me up.
So here I am on the verge of rediscovering my wife, my kids, my earthly joys and they are to me far sweeter then when I left them. I’ve known what it is to want and not have; I’ve learned how to be content when I have nothing.
Because losing yourself is finding joy.